Alexander Revisited:
The Final Cut

Crateros:
I’ve seen one before, it was still alive.

Hephaistion:
To whom do you pray?

Alexander:
Phobos.

Hephaistion:
Fear?

Alexander:
A bad omen. More so for Darius. I’ve come to believe the fear of death drives all men, Hephaistion. And this we didn’t learn as schoolboys. It is the cause of all our misfortunes.
So, mighty Crateros.

Crateros:
Your Majesty.

Alexander: Are you ready for tomorrow?

Crateros:
It’s been too long coming, if you ask me. The men are skittish as colts and the damn bulls won’t shut their snouts.

Alexander:
Good. Fear makes man fight better. Post your sentries alertly, but rest them well.

Crateros:
Don’t worry, general. I’m known to sleep with my eyes open as a baby arse.

Young soldier:
Only because someone might steal his loot, sire. Well, someone owes Crateros for his cheapness. He buys neither gloves nor blankets to warm himself.

Soldier:
He’s right.

Alexander:
Who needs gloves when you come from grace? Who needs clothes when you can fight naked?
After tomorrow, even the thrifty among you shall be kings.

Soldier:
The gods are with us, Your Majesty.

Soldier:
We’ll stain the ground in Persian’s blood.

Crateros (to the young soldier):
You’re on the first row tomorrow, boy.

Hephaistion:
I’ve always believe, Alexander, but this seems so much bigger than us.

Alexander:
Did Patroclus doubt Achilles when they stood side by side at the seat of Troy?

Hephaistion:
Patroclus died first.

Alexander:
If you do… If you were to fall, Hephaistion, even if Macedonia were to lose a king, I will avenge you. And follow you down to the house of death. Hephaistion: I would do the same.

Alexander:
On the eve of battle, it’s hardest to be alone.

Hephaistion:
Then perhaps… Perhaps this is farewell, then… My Alexander.

Alexander:
Fear not, Hephaistion. We are at the beginning.

Macedonian left:
Philotas:
Father! We must fall back to the gully, Father!

Parmenion:
No, hold! Where is he? We’re far too thin! Get word to Alexander! Move!

Soldier:
Yes, sir.

Macedonian right:
Alexander:
Come, Macedonians! Ride! Ride! Drive for the hole!

Soldiers:
Drive for the hole! Drive for the hole!

Macedonian center:

Darius:
Prince Merdicus, bring these men up.

Macedonian left:
Parmenion:
Back and to the left! Back and to the left!

Soldier:
General!

Soldier:
Get to your home! And go home fast.

Parmenion:
I cannot see! Philotas! Philotas!

Philotas:
Father.

Parmenion:
Go. Tell Alexander yourself. And if he won’t listen, then survive me and avenge this betrayal!

Macedonian center:
Black Cleitus:
Pay attention, lad! Your father still watches over you!

Alexander:
Darius!
(to Hephaistion) Find your horses.
Darius!

Darius:
Go! Go!

Alexander:
We can reach those mountains by sunset, go all night and catch Darius at dawn. Provision the horses!

Philotas:
Alexander! Alexander, my father’s lost. They’ve overrun the flank! They’re into the baggage train.

Hephaistion:
Parmenion’s crumbling.

Ptolemy:
Alexander, if you chase him, you risk losing your army here.

Alexander:
And if we capture him, we gain an empire.
 “You can run to the end of the earth, you coward! But you’ll never run far enough!”
To Parmenion!

7 years later

Leonidas:
You don’t need much to fight. When you’re in the front ranks of a battle, facing some Northern barbarian tribe, courage won’t be in the soles of your feet, Perdicass. Or in the thickness of your tunic, Philotas. Or in the lining of your stomach, Nearchus. It’s in the heart of a man.
You don’t need to eat every day or until you’re full, Ptolemy. You don’t need to lie in bed in a morning when you can have some good bean soup, Cassander, after a forced night march.
Come on, Alexander, where’s your hunger to twist Hephaistion’s head off? Is he stronger than you? Then beat him another way.
Come on. Who will respect you as a king? You think because of your father?
The first rule of war is to do what you ask your men to do. No more, no less.
Good, Hephaistion. That’s it. Well, done. Good wrestling, Hephaistion. That’s what I want. Come, come, come. You did well, but you lost. Now, both of you, congratulate the other. Go on.

Young Hephaistion:
Would you want me to let you win, Alexander?

Young Alexander:
You’re right. But I promise you I will beat you one day, Hephaistion.


Aristotle:
Although an inferior race, the Persians control at least four-fifths of the known world.
From Ethiopia and Egypt in the south to Caucasus and the two inland seas in the north.

Aristotle:
They rule, and we sit around like frogs.

Young Nearchus:
Master?

Aristotle:
Yes?

Young
Nearchus: Master, master?

Aristotle:
Out with it. Out with it.

Young Nearchus:
Why are the Persians so cruel?

Aristotle:
Oh, come, on, Nearchus. That is not the subject for today, Nearchus. But…
…It is true that the Oriental races are known for their barbarity and their slavish devotion to their senses. Which are so dull, they castrate young boys such as yourselves, for their sexual pleasure. Yes, excess in all things is the undoing of men. That is why we Greeks are superior. We practise control of our senses. Moderation, we hope.

Young Cassander:
Then what of Achilles of Troy, master? Was he not excessive?

Aristotle:
Achilles simply lacks restraint. He dominates others so completely that even when he withdraws from battle, crazed with grief over his dead lover, Patroclus, he seriously endangers his own army. He is a deeply selfish man.

Young Cassander:
Then would you say the love between Achilles and Patroclus is a corrupting one?

Aristotle:
When men lie together in lust, it is a surrender to the passions and does nothing for the excellence in us. Nor does any other excess, Cassander, jealousy among them. But when men lie together, and knowledge and virtue are passed between them, that is pure and excellent. When they compete to bring out the good, the best in each other, this is the love between men that can build a city-state and lift us from our frog pond.

Young Perdicass:
But can a man love a woman equally, master?

Aristotle:
A woman? Of course not. A woman is a slave to her passion, Hephaistion. Oh, naturally there are exceptions, and we must honor them. Such as Pallas Athena, goddess of wisdom and war. But never forget, she is sprung not from the loins of Zeus, but from his mind.
Now, you think on all this, my young frogs, for in you resides the future of Greek civilization. To strive for honor is the highest purpose of all. To rule over our baser emotions. To follow reason, the divine part in each of you. Yes …To love excellence, is truly to love the gods.
Now, would you stop distracting me? Back to geography, things that we know. Is it possible that the source of Egypt’s mighty River Nile could rise in these distant mountains of the outer earth?
If so, an experienced navigator could find his way here, by this river east, down into the great plains of India, out into the eastern ocean at the end of the world and by this route up the Nile, back to Egypt, into the Middle Sea and home to Greece.
Now if only these frogs could look outward and act on their favored position at the center, Greece could rule the world.

Young Alexander:
Why is it, master, in myth, these lands you speak of are known?
India, where Herakles and Dionysus travelled. All these men who went east, Thesues, Jason, Achilles, were victorious. From generation to generation, their stories have been passed on.
Why? Unless there was truth to them.

Aristotle:
Tales of Amazons? Minotaurs, Gorgons, Icarus flying into the sun? No, Alexander.
Only common people believe these tales, as they believe most anything. We are here precisely to educate ourselves against such foolish passions.

Young Alexander:
But if we are superior to the Persians, as you say, why do we not rule them?
It is –it has always been our Greek’s dream to go east. My father long wants it.

Aristotle:
The East has a way of swallowing men and their dreams.

Young Alexander:
But still, to think it’s these myths that lead us forward to the greatest glory. Why is it wrong to act on them?

Aristotle:
I can only warn you, not teach you: Beware of what you dream for, the gods have a way of punishing such pride.

Babylon, Persia 331 B.C. – 13 years later.

Phalanx leader:
Phalanx!


The crowd:
Sikander! Sikander!

Cassander:
Aristotle may have called them barbarians, but he never saw Babylon.
We have enough gold here to support three generations of Macedonian armies.

Alexander:
And Macedonia would soon corrupt, Cassander. “Wealth in great quantities brings the crows.”

Antigonus: Not for the man who fought, I trust.

Alexander:
We’ll pay them well, Antigonus, but not as mercenaries for future services.

Nearchus:
Now you sound like Philip.

Hephaistion:
Philip never saw Babylon.

Ptolemy:
No, he didn’t, Hephaistion.

The boys:
Hello! Hello!

Parmenion:
Alexander, I know you think me a stiff old sod, but whatever our differences, know this day your father would be very proud of you.

Alexander:
Thank you, Parmenion.
I ask you to forgive me, my own anger, my pride. They, too, blind me.

Cassander:
A magnificent mainland work from the last century. The golden age, Alexander. Worth much to Athens and to our alliances.

Alexander:
Take back what is ours but spare what belongs to the Persians.

Ptolemy:
Yes, we’re the richest men to walk the earth, my friends.

Black Cleitus:
Not if you keep giving it all away.

Ptolemy:
The grandsons of goat herders, we now rule 2 million square miles. But, none of you fear that this great fortune may drive us all to destruction.

Alexander:
You overvalue us. For as long as Darius breathes, he is the legitimate king of Asia. And I, but the king of air.

Philotas:
But he has no power, Alexander. He’s lost in the mountains with no army.

Alexander:
As long as he’s lost, Philotas, he can be believed in. Only when he’s found will it be decided.

Parmenion:
It seems that you’ve already made up your mind, Alexander.

Alexander:
We must finish what we failed to do at Gaugamela, Parmenion. We must hunt Darius down.

Parmenion: That was not your father’s mission.

Alexander:
And I am not my father.
Come on, have you so quickly forgotten? Fortune favors the bold!

Alexander:
It’s high ransom she charges for nine months lodging in the womb. Hephaistion: Bring her, Alexander. It will bring her such joy.

Alexander:
Joy? When I’m the cracked mirror of her dream? Stay with me tonight, Hephaistion. I’ll take my own bath. (To Bagoas) Thank you, Bagoas.

Hephaistion:
What bother you?

Alexander:
I see in her everything I fear. Yet I have no idea what it is, this fear. She was always so sure I was born of Zeus. Why, Hephaistioin?

Hephaistion:
I think there are things beyond our imagining. Like the lightning, tales of strange conceptions. I don’t doubt it.  Alexander: What is being told me? What destiny do we--? Do I have?

Hephaistion:
Well, if I’m Patroclus, I die first. Then you, Achilles. The generals are upset. They question your obsession with Darius. They say it was never meant for you to be king of Asia.

Alexander: Naturally.
They want only to return to their homes, rich with gold. But I’ve seen the future, Hephaistion. I’ve seen it now a thousand times on a thousand faces. These people want --need change. Aristotle was wrong about them.

Hephaistion:
How so?

Alexander:
Look at those we’ve conquered. They leave their dead unburied. They smashed their enemies’ skulls and drink them as dust. They mate in public. What can they think or can sing or write if none can read? But as Alexander’s army, they can go where they never thought possible. They can soldier or work in the cities. The Alexandrias, from Egypt to the outer ocean. We could connect these lands, Hephaistion …and the people.

Hephaistion:
Some say that these Alexandrias have become extensions of Alexander himself. They draw people into the cities to make slaves of them.

Alexander:
But we freed them, Hephaistion, from Persia where everyone lived as slaves. To free the people of the world, such would be beyond the glory of Achilles, beyond Herakles, a feat to rival Prometheus who was always a friend to man.

Hephaistion:
Remember the fate of these heroes. They suffered greatly.

Alexander:
Oh, we all suffer. Your father, mine. They all came to the end of their time. And in the end, when it’s over, all that matters is what you’ve done.

Hephaistion:
You once said, The fear of death drives all men. Are there no other forces? Is there not love in your life… Alexander? What would you do if you ever reach the end of the world? Alexander: I’d turn back and conquer its opposite.

Hephaistion:
I wonder sometimes if it’s not your mother you run from. So many years, so many miles between you. What is it you fear?

Alexander:
Who knows these things? When I was a child, my mother thought me divine. My father, weak. Which am I Hephaistion? Weak or divine? All I know is, I trust only you in this world. I’ve missed you. I need you. It is you I love, Hephaistion. No other.

Hephaistion:
You’re everything I care for. And by the sweet breath of Aphrodite, I’m so jealous of losing you to this world you want.

Alexander:
You’ll never lose me, Hephaistion. I’ll be with you always. Till the end.

Balkh, Bactria

Alexander:
Through our union, Greek and barbarian may be reconciled in peace.

Alexander:
On this glorious occasion, I toast this great army that has given so much. And in honor of them, those of you who set out with us seven long years ago, I pronounce all your debs paid forthwith from the royal treasury. 

The soldiers:
Praise Alexander!

Alexander:
And in honor of my bride -my beautiful bride, we recognize the many women who’ve shared the long hard road with us. And grant them dowries befitting a proper marriage.

Black Cleitus:
What about our boys?

Alexander:
And lastly, lastly, the gods demand no less of us that your children be given a proper Greek education and military training under our protection so as to be the new soldiers of our kingdom in Asia.



Parmenion:
Your father must be turning in his grave, Alexander. After all this time, a hill chief’s daughter? You call this tribal wedding legitimate?

Alexander: Do you forget my father took a barbarian as his queen?

Parmenion:
Yes, but few would call it a profoundly happy marriage.

Philotas:
But what’s the point, Alexander? She’s your captive. Just take her as your concubine.

Alexander:
Cos I want a son. Damn you, Philotas.

Philotas:
Then half you nobles have sisters who’d make fine Macedonian mothers.

Alexander:
To take an Asian as my queen, not a captive, is a sign of deep respect for our subject. It will bring us together, unify us. Which is not to say I won’t take a Macedonian.

Philotas: As a second wife? You insult Macedonia.

Antigonus:
Never will our people accept this girl’s son as king. They’ll be angry enough to find out their husbands all have second wives in Barbaria.

Alexander:
Then they’ll learn! By Athena’s justice, this girl has spirit. She’ll breed a brave son.

Polyperchon:
Alexander! This is about the honor of our kingdom.

Parmenion:
Exactly. What can be won, Alexander? We’re in Asia to punish them for their crimes. We’ve achieved that. Seven years from home, now we drift from one far region to another, chasing nomads and bandits when Macedonia bleeds its manpower. For what? To build roads in Asia? To give these people cities?

Black Cleitus:
And now make an army of them?

Alexander:
To found cities and expand our reach is not to drift, Parmenion.

Parmenion:
What benefit to Macedon?

Alexander:
It’s far richer than before!

Parmenion:
Look what you give them.

Nearchus:
With respect, Parmenion, had you fought better at Gaugamela when your flank was crumbling we would’ve had Darius--

Philotas:
How dare you, Nearchus?!

Nearchus:
General Nearchus, to you, boy.

Philotas:
Alexander spread our flank too thin! There was nothing my father, or any of you, could’ve done!

Parmenion:
Philotas! (To Alexander) Alexander, I’ve known you since you were born. I supported you at your father’s death. At the very least, for Zeus’ sake, and in respect to the council that chose you king, give us a Macedonian heir. A Macedonian heir.

Alexander:
You’ve been heard clearly.

Parmenion: But—

Alexander:
Parmenion! After the wedding, take two brigades back to Babylon, where I look to you and Antipater in Greece, to maintain our empire and supply this expedition. I’ll winter in the north with my army at Marakand.

Parmenion:
I pray to Apollo you’ll soon realize how far you’ve turned from your father’s path.

Alexander:
I damn you, Parmenion, by the gods and your Apollo. What was in my father’s guts wasn’t overripe in reason like yours!

Parmenion:
He never lusted for war, Alexander, or enjoyed it so. He consulted his peers in council, among equals, the Macedonian way. He didn’t make decisions based on his personal desires.

Alexander:
I’ve taken us further than my father ever dreamed. Old man… we’re in new worlds.

Cassander:
Alexander, be reasonable! Were they ever meant to be our equals? Share our rewards? You remember what Aristotle said. An Asian? What would a vow mean to a race that’s never kept their word to a Greek? Alexander: Aristotle be damned!

Others:
Alexander!

Alexander:
By Zeus and all the gods, what makes you so much better than them, Cassander? Better than you really are. In you and those like you is this.

Hephaistion:
Alexander.

Alexander:
What disturbs me the most is not your lack of respect for my judgement. It’s your contempt for a world far older than ours.

Black Cleitus:
Five to any man who bothers to kill me.

Hephaistion:
Have another drink, Cleitus.

Black Cleitus:
Shouldn’t you be bowing to the king?

Nearchus:
Cleitus.

Oxyartes:
Alexander, you look weak when you not accept these honors.

Alexander:
I understand, my dear father, but it’s against Greek ways.

Oxyartes:
Then Greek ways are weak.

Persian Chamberlain:
I still think she got the better of him in this bargain.

Oxyartes:
My daughter, Roxane, she shall make you good wife. She shall kill for you. Raw skunk, ruler of heaven… and earth. In honor of this great alliance, I, Oxyartes, offer you these great gifts. Some tribe leader: I would like to honor a toast to you from my people.

Cup bearer:
Good morning, sire.

Oxyartes:
We shall fight for you, Alexander. It shall be bloody.

Alexander:
Who’s the bear?

Ptolemy:
Parmenion. He’s been in complete control of your supply lines.

Alexander:
His pessimism is infectious. But he’ll stay loyal, as long as his son remains with us.

Persian Chamberlain:
Her eyes tell me she cares for you, Alexander. Perhaps too much. In the ways of my country, those who love too much, lose everything. And those who love with irony, last.

Hephaistion:
I found it in Egypt. The man who sold it said it came from a time when man worshipped sun and stars. I’ll always think of you as the sun, Alexander. And I pray your dream will shine on all men. I wish you a son. 

Alexander:
You’re a great man.

Hephaistion:
Many will love you, Alexander, but none so pure and deep.

Roxane:
You loves him?

Alexander:
He is Hephaistion. (To Bagoas) Thank you, Bagoas.

Roxane:
Your boy?

Alexander:
There are many different ways to love, Roxane. Come.

Roxane:
No. No, no!

Alexander:
You have no fear. It’s fitting. “A man searches for a woman at the Earth’s top… and finds her.”

India – 7 B.C

Soldier:
Over there!

Hephaistion:
They’re animals.


Alexander:
Monkey. Monkey.

Alexander:
(To the monkey) Hello, little man.
(To Hephaistion) Do they speak?

Hephaistion:
No, but they do sing and make noises from the roofs of the forests.


Alexander:
Well done today. Make sure the women and children are fed.
You know better, Machatas. What’s your son going to say? Come on, man. The older you get, the stronger.

Machatas:
Right, my king. You’re my horse, Alexander. I’ll be with you at your side.


Crateros:
What happened?

Alexander:
It’s to the neck.

Crateros:
Oh, no. Zeus, no. Hold on, hold on. Be brave. Be brave. Oh, Zeus…

Black Cleitus:
A toast to Bagoas. And the 30,000 beautiful Persian boys...we're training to fight in this great army. And to the memory of Philip. Had he lived to see his Macedonians...transformed into such...a pretty army. To Philip. To a real hero.

The crowd:
Philip!

Ptolemy:
To Cleitus and his new appointment as satrap of Bactria.

The crowd:
Cleitus.

 Black Cleitus:
That's a fancy way of putting it, Ptolemy. But we all know what a pension and an exile is...after 30 years' service.

Alexander:
Exile? From where, Cleitus?

Black Cleitus:
From my home, Alexander, Macedonia. You could've asked me where I wanted to spend the rest of my life.

Alexander:
You call governing this major province exile?

Black Cleitus:
Has Your Majesty given any of his closest companions...a province so far from home?

Alexander:
Then you won't make a very good satrap, will you, Cleitus?

 Black Cleitus: So be it. Let me rot in Macedonian rags...rather than shine...in Eastern pomp. I won't quake and bow down like the sycophants you have around you. Hephaistion, Nearchus, Perdiccas.

Alexander:
As governor of one of our most Asian of satrapies...Cleitus, does it not occur to you that if my Persian subjects...bow down before me, it's important for them to do so? Do I insist on Greeks doing the same? 

Black Cleitus:
You accept Greek offerings as a son of Zeus, do you not?

Alexander:
Only when offered.

Black Cleitus:
Why don't you refuse these vain flatteries? What freedom is this, to bow before you?

Alexander:
You bow before Herakles, and he was mortal...but a son of Zeus. 

Black Cleitus:
How can you, so young, compare yourself to Herakles?

Alexander:
Why not? I've achieved more in my years. Traveled as far. Probably farther.

Black Cleitus:
Herakles did it by himself. Did you conquer Asia by yourself, Alexander? Who planned the Asian invasion...when you were still being spanked on your bottom by my sister Lanice? Was it not your father? Or is his blood no longer good enough? 

Crateros:
Hei...

Black Cleitus:
Zeus-Amon, is it?

Alexander:
You insult me, Cleitus. You mock my family. Be careful.

Black Cleitus:
Never would your father have taken barbarians as his friends...asked us to fight with them as equals in war. Are we not good enough any longer? I remember a time...when we could talk as men, straight to the eye. None of this scraping, groveling. I remember a time when we hunted...when we wrestled on the gymnasium floor. Now you kiss them? Take a barbarian, childless wife and dare call her queen?

Alexander:
Go quickly, Cleitus, before you ruin your life.

Black Cleitus:
Doesn't your great pride fear the gods any longer? This army...This army is your blood, boy!

Philip ghost:
Without it, you're nothing!

Alexander:
You no longer serve the purpose of this march! Get him from my sight!

Black Cleitus:
I don't serve your purpose?! What was I serving when I saved your puppy life at Gaugamela? Were you Zeus' boy? What if I left you to die in the dust there? Do you think we'd be forced now to mate with brown apes? 

Hephaistion:
Alexander!

Alexander:
Turn out the guards! Arrest him for treason!

Crateros:
I'll go with him. -Alexander.

Alexander:
Who's with him?

Guest:
No.

Alexander:
Who's with him? I call Father Zeus to witness. I call you to trial before him! And we'll see how deep this conspiracy cuts! Take him!

Hephaistion:
In the name of the gods, get him out!

Black Cleitus:
Now look at you! Great white ass, Alexander. Hiding behind his fairy god! Oh! Or are you too great to remember whose life was saved by me?! I am more a man than you'll ever be! Ever!

Crateros:
Get him out!

Antigonus:
He's gone. He's gone.

Hephaistion:
Alexander. 

Antigonus:
Come on!

Black Cleitus:
What a tyrant you are! An evil tyrant you've become, Alexander. You speak of plots against you? What about poor Parmenion?

Antigonus:
Get out! Get out of here!

Black Cleitus:
He served you well. Look how you repaid him. You made me do your foul deed. Have you no shame?

Alexander:
You ungrateful wretch! No one, not my vilest enemy, has spoken like you to me.

Black Cleitus:
Getting what I say?! Despot. False king. You and your barbarian mother live in shame.

Alexander:
Cleitus. Oh, my Cleitus. Cleitus.

Philip: Pausanias, I told you-

Nearchus: